TEMPTATIONS, HIDDEN SNARES OFTEN TAKE US UNAWARES,AND OUR HEARTS ARE MADE TO BLEED FOR MANY A THOUGHTLESS WORD OR DEED, AND WE WONDER WHY THE TEST WHEN WE TRY TO DO OUR BEST. BUT WE WILL UNDERSTAND IT BETTER BY AND BY."
"There was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag
of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, to hammer a
nail in the back fence.
The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence.
Then it gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold
his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He
told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now
pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.
The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father
that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and
led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look
at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in
anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a
man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry,
the wound is still there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one."
When a relationship is broken, whether it be by words spoken by the mouth or in some deed or action. The relationship is broken! If you want it to be whole again.....then there must be a work done. It will not take place over night because as the story above tells us the scars are and will always be there. But the work must be started. It takes only one to take that step. It takes a really big person to say some of the simplest words known to man....."I AM SORRY." This does not mean that you started the argument or why it turned out this way, but in an argument, when tempers are lost....words are said that should never have been spoken. Even when the things said might have been right or for the good of another, if spoken in anger.....they can never have a good end. Words can never be pulled back into the mouth, while the heart is made right. They just can't ever be spoken!
When you tell another that you are sorry, it may or may not help the other person but it will set your own heart free and you can go on in a right relationship with God. I know, I have been here before twice in my life. Hurts in a family are the hardest of all the hurts you can receive. It is because there has been a lifetime of love and trust involved. First rule, we are all human and we all sin. We do not know the heart of another or what they have been or are going through. We can not know what caused the up-heav-al in ones life that has brought a person to this point in the lives of any of the parties involved.
Now if we can maintain our tempers and point out things that another needs to hear, is this the time, the place and have we prayed about our response. Sadly to say, most of the time, we have not. The only answer remains we must forgive.....to be able to move forward....we must forgive !!!
The relationship can be restored and made better than ever.....I am a personal witness to this. God keeps His Word. He does not fail us, when we do as He has commanded us....".FORGIVE."
Just take a piece of paper, draw a line down the middle and write down all the good that you know of the person. All the good times you have shared. Then on the other side write down how you would like things to be. Oooh yes,and all the bad, let the Lord God take care of these things, when we get perfect then we can be in charge and until then we have to take each other with their own imperfections and all the while knowing that others also have to take us with all our perfections.
In my two relationships......in the one, we have a relationship, not as good as it could have been had we both been perfect but we have one and I thank God . In the other relationship.....because there was forgiveness and a willingness to work.....today our relationship is better than we ever though possible. I thank God.
The longer it takes to start the work, the longer and possibly never, will the results be achieved and brought to a desired good end. This goes for all relationships. There is a rule that must be followed and if not, then we live in a world where we are stuck or going down to a place in our lives that we do not want to go as a Christian first of all but not even as a human being. To be like Christ, who loved us even when we didn't care anything about Him, yet He loved us enough to die for us. Are we like Christ? He loves us even when we fail Him and He waits for us to return to where we left Him. Now in the human life, being that neither of us are perfect, it takes one to step forth, throwing off their pride, not caring who is right or wrong, but just wanting to make things right. Like I said if not for the other person for ourselves to have our heart set free. connie
